Today has been an extremely difficult day for my family and I. It would have been my beautiful Gran McElhinney’s 80th birthday today and she is no longer here to celebrate her special day. She spoke last year of having a party and doing something memorable for it – I am so disappointed that she was not fortunate enough to do so. I know that she will be reunited with my Papa though and enjoying her 80th birthday with her one and only.
My mum, dad and I visited my Gran and Papa’s grave today to take up some flowers for my Gran’s birthday. As we stood by her graveside all I could feel was profound emptiness; I kept thinking about if she were here, at this moment, she would be getting all dolled up for her party and looking as radiant and glamorous as ever. My Gran: She certainly was one of the most impeccable and stunning ladies that you could ever come across in your lifetime (and I’m not just saying that because she is my Gran). Afterwards, once my parents and I had tidied around the grave, sorted out flowers and shared a few words, we decided to go and visit one of my Gran’s closest friends and neighbour (who thought very highly of my Gran). Her name is Mary. She was delighted to see us and made us feel ever so welcome. She has been a dear friend to my Gran for many years – my dad used to be friends with her sons when they were boys. Mary misses my Gran very much and so she took comfort from our visit and it was wonderful to catch up with one another. I know, for sure, my Gran was looking down on us all today. I could feel it.
Before we left the area, we passed by my Gran McElhinney’s house (which now has new tenants). It was truly heartbreaking – if I’m 100% honest. All of my Gran’s beautiful garden ornaments and lovely rose bushes were all gone. Everything that my Gran loved and appreciated, with all of her heart and soul, was gone. Even her garden shed was gone. It was a stab in the gut to me. I fully understand that when people move into a house that they want to make that house their home and they have every right to do what they want with it. Seeing that today, though, was devastating. Not being able to pop into the house – just to feel her presence – was hard. I can’t imagine how my dad must have felt. He was brought up there, spent his whole life in that house, and to see it like that – it must have been dreadful.
We were all very strong today (probably because we had one another – and that’s important). It turned out to be a pleasant day because we got to spend some time with one of my Gran’s dearest friend’s who thoroughly enjoyed our company.
I miss my Gran ever so much. Not a day goes by where I do not think of her and wish I could have her back – here – with me. There is so much I want to say. There is so much I want to ask. I don’t believe there is anyone else in this world that I could ever speak to the way I spoke with my Gran – she was something else. She will definitely be missed eternally and I will always look up to her and aspire to be just like her some day.
Happy Birthday my beautiful angel.
Also today, my mother and I went in to Tesco for some shopping. Whilst we were walking through the supermarket, a man tapped my mum on the shoulder and he said, “Excuse me, I hope you don’t mind me saying, but you’re daughter is just absolutely stunning.” (I could feel my cheeks burning and my face turning into a tomatoe) My mum replied, “Thank you so much! She doesn’t seem to think so though”. His wife then remarked, “Well, she should -she’s absolutely beautiful. You’re beautiful, hen.” I was taken aback. They were both so polite. How lovely! My mother looked as though she was bursting with pride. I could not get over it – two complete strangers, took the time to tell my mother that I was ‘stunning’, they did not need to do that – but they did. It was a very sweet moment and I shall always remember it. I wonder if perhaps that was a sign from my Gran? Who knows.
As always, I’ll leave my details at the bottom. Just incase you want to contact me or keep up to date with my life and what is going on with me when I am not blogging.
Until next time
Twitter: @mcelhinneyxx @blogabtnothing1