Am I even a blogger?
This post has been brewing for quite some time now; I keep asking myself if I am actually worthy of the title ‘blogger’. I scroll down my social media feed day in and day out and see a plethora of individuals knocking the ball right out of the park and absolutely smashing it and I sit at the other end of my screen wishing that was me.
Wishing I could up my photography game. Wishing I had a schedule and regularly stuck to it. Wishing I could religiously schedule tweets and posts without just going through phases. Wishing my content was original, unique, exciting, more ‘bloggery’. My blog is like an online journal – I don’t have a niche – I don’t write about anything in particular. One day, I’ll be writing a book review (or attempting to) and the next day I’m talking about getting my lady region waxed. One day I’m writing about my life and what I’ve been up to and the next I’m talking about my non-existent life and what I’m not up to. I don’t know. I sometimes just wish I had a niche. I write about my mind and my battle with Depression and Anxiety sometimes. Does that make me a Mental Health blogger? I write about going to the gym from time to time. Does that make me a fitness blogger? What am I and where do I fit in?
I feel like I don’t fit in anywhere. It sucks. It’s disheartening. I’m constantly seeing bloggers excelling and being nominated for awards front, left and centre and don’t get me wrong, I revel in the success of others, and I’m genuinely happy to see my fellow blogger buddies getting the recognition they deserve but I just feel like a spare part.
Why am I not getting any recognition? Why do I never seem to progress or go anywhere? When will I fit in? When will I grow? Am I just overthinking?
My mind is buzzing with so many ideas; I just never see them through. I let myself down. And then I bring myself down. It’s a vicious circle and when will I ever escape it?
I love the blogging community. I don’t actually know where I’d be without it now that I’m a part of it. I just wish I was a more pivotal part of it.